Abominable, atrocious, deplorable, horrid, lamentable Council!

Oudtshoorn is being destroyed by incompetence and lethargy

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Oudtshoorn. 7 July 2012. 13h15. A Local Government has but one function and one function only: To create an environment within which its constituents can thrive.

Oudtshoorn’s government fails dreadfully.

Look at Rose Valley – the singlemost infelicitously named residential area in social history.

Look at Rosebank.

Look at the Vaal Huisies.

Gordon April, that nescient incompetent arrogating as “Executive Mayor”, and his farraginous fraternity of feckless fitchews couldn’t manage ducks to water.

The ANC in Oudtshoorn is coming apart at the seams. The factions distrust and despise each other. The sidekicks, Icosa and the NPP, ride the gravy train into the ground on the unspeakably embarrassing fare of a thousand votes apiece out of 56,000.

The opposition DA spends more time fabricating reasons not to govern that serving its numerical majority.

This outrage must end!

It is clear that Oudtshoorn does not have the communal vim to act. Had Oudtshoorn even a velleity of such vigour, April and his acephalous apostates would be a past hiccup on Oudtshoorn’s march to sustainable success.

The hebetudinous Provincial Minister of Local Government is a wimp. Period. The man has less spirit than week-old carrion. Look to him for action in vain.

What is to be done?

Oudtshoorn needs a single leader of unremitting commitment mustering a small Gideons band of social mavins to reach the great unwashed of our rural domains.

In short: Oudtshoorn needs a voice that will reach the poorest of the poor with the message of exactly how terribly the ANC is screwing up ordinary lives in Oudtshoorn. It’s no use whatsoever to attempt to tell people that another government will do better until the people are convinced that the current government is shafting them.



Lethargy, n. A state of comatose torpor (as found in sleeping sickness); weakness characterized by a lack of vitality or energy; inactivity; showing an unusual lack of energy.

Constituent, n. A citizen who is represented in a government by officials for whom he or she votes.

Nescient, adj. Uneducated in general; lacking knowledge or sophistication.

Arrogate, v. Make undue claims to having.

Farraginous, adj. Composed of a mixture of substances; hodgepodge.

Fraternity, n. People engaged in a particular occupation.

Feckless, adj. Not fit to assume responsibility; Generally incompetent and ineffectual.

Fitchew, n. Dark brown mustelid of woodlands of Eurasia that gives off an unpleasant odour when threatened. Says Peter Bowler, author of the delightfull little volume, The Superior Person’s Little Book of Words: “A good name for a politician.”

Velleity, n. A mere wish, unaccompanied by effort to obtain; volition in its weakest form.

Acephalous, adj. Lacking a head or a clearly defined head.

Apostate, n. A disloyal person who betrays or deserts his cause or religion or political party or friend etc.

Hebetudinous, adj. Lacking in liveliness or animation.

Wimp, n. (1) A person who lacks confidence, is irresolute and wishy-washy; (2) A weakly interacting massive particle – a hypothetical subatomic particle of large mass that interacts weakly with ordinary matter through gravitation; postulated as a constituent of the dark matter of the universe.

Carrion, n. The dead and rotting body of an animal.

Mavin, n. Someone who is dazzlingly skilled in any field.

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